A little pre-new years thinking

I would like to pause for a moment tonight and think about life.

I often have a full and overflowing heart. A heart that isn’t spilling over because of joy necessarily, but because of emotion; a happiness really, that is grown out of deep and variant feeling. Mine is a happiness born of adversity, like so many others. In life’s struggles we are forced to look up, to brace our feet and find the worth of our armory. The battles and victories lengthen and broaden and forge our thinking and show, as it has been put in past times, our mettle. My happiness does not exist because my life is perfect but really, because it is flawed, because I am flawed. I have a happiness that is because, through all of life this year, the ups and downs, God has been near; always near. I have had great need of him.

It has always struck me as odd that a need for someone greater and more far seeing than oneself would be considered a crutch; and that crutch a bad thing. A crutch is a very handy implement to have when there is a weakness of limb. I hate to be the one to mention it bluntly but every one of us, (us humans) have weakness of soul that no amount of trying can strengthen or overcome….alone. We can all have the essential crutch, or should I say: support. Only a fool says in his heart there is no God, I speak to those not fools when I say, in your remembrance of the year that is slipping into history and your anticipation of the year that is on the brink of living, don’t make a go of it alone.  

God is near.

The post Christmas blues

Though I should be working on my new years resolutions, documenting the remainder of our 25 days of Christmas or perhaps recording the meaningful happenings of Christmas day, I am sitting in my favorite oversized sweater eating an unhealthy amount of chocolate from my Christmas stocking while gazing inadvertently at the pile of boxes that represent the breakdown of my Christmas decorations.
I might have a twinge of the post Christmas blues.
Am not ready to clean the house. Am not ready to change gears from heavy celebration to “PRODUCTION!”. I have always considered the week between Christmas and New Years to be a sort of reprieve from real life. I don’t mean one doesn’t have to work or cook or function normally; I just mean you began the adjustment slowly to the idea of a better you. Yes, a better you. However, the slow adjustment process, that being one week, does not allow, I think, for adequate come down from the lengthy preparation we just participated in. Yes, Christmas is over, and it was wonderful. Though I can’t call my feelings sad, they are at any rate subdued. I washed and brushed my hair today, had to wiggle a couple times to get my new skinny jeans buttoned and instead of feeling grand, I felt unnecessarily starched. Not jolly, oh dear, not jolly. The truth is, I miss the preparations leading up to the big party.

So if you are like me, you might want to indulge the blues just a little, put on the Trans Siberian Orchestras Carol of the Bells and drink the left over egg nog…. you don’t have to quit cold turkey.

 

Party in pj's

My sister always hosts a "bring in the Christmas season" party sometime in early November. This year the invitations were received and some of us were chagrined to see the words “formal attire”. Not that I am not totally into make up and curling irons and strapless numbers, but… I am more into thick socks pulled up my calf and my husbands baggy sweaters (I wonder if I have lost some of my sex appeal). Nevertheless, the five of us arrived in red and green and I complained a little out loud but mostly in my head; Though I must say, I would wear that sequined thin red thing again despite having to starve half the day, just for that girls spiked eggnog.
But I digress.
 The season has marched on; all too quickly. We have been busy with shopping and parties, baking and movie watching, present wrapping and crafts (not to mention a little of the everyday necessaries). My husband was determined to host a Christmas party this year since the year past had me pregnant up to my ears (baby was due Christmas of 2012 but came new years day) and not about to put my pants on for any reason less than the beginning of labor. So after a weekend of endless festivities and, I must say, some simply wonderful Christmas parties, my husband and I hosted “Christmas Eve Eve Hour” tonight. Yes, one hour. The invitations said “come in your cozies, formal attire not welcome”. I enjoyed seeing my guests come in pajamas and robes as much as my sister must have enjoyed seeing all her guests in suits and ties. My daughter really wanted to wear her Christmas dress because, of course, that is what you wear to a Christmas party, but after her cousins came in their cozy jamma’s, she discreetly retired to her room to change. Just the way I like it, short and comfy. we ate, we talked, we sang one very badly done song, and everyone departed in high spirits. We had our party and now I am just enjoying a little bit of silence, thankful for the December festivities and knowing that "something big happened" and that's why we celebrate so very much this time of year.

I am excited to link up with myjollylittlelife for the January blogathon she is hosting. Will try to improve in picture taking as well. Ha Ha.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Do something Christmasy

We have but eight more sleeps till Christmas. So far, I think I have enjoyed this Christmas season more than seasons past. I have stayed in the moment more than is usual for me. I have enjoyed the simple little celebrations of Christmas that we have done every day. I think focusing on the blessing of giving as well as the art of living with and for my children has enlarged my own soul. Writing now to re-cap a bit on what our daily Christmasy activities have been so far.

1. Tree trimming party at my parents
2. Family tree trimming with just the five of us: Christmas carols and honey eggnog
3. Made Thimble cookies
4. Decorated a homemade card and delivered Thimble cookies to some family busy unpacking from a move.
5. Packed up a bag of toys and clothes to give away. Delivered said bag to the good will.
6. Made and decorated snowflakes. Hung them in the window.
7. Watched Muppets Christmas Carol.
8. Drove around town and looked at Christmas lights.
9. Made cake in a jar. Tried a fun recipe where you bake the cake in canning jars and put the lid on when still hot to seal it. Can be given as gifts with pretty bows and ribbons tied on the top.
10. Made Gingerbread cookies. The kids get their chunks of dough and away they go. These are not for giving away; way too much touching and rolling and touching and re-rolling to make these edible to anyone but them.
11. Started brushing up on the Christmas story in Luke 2.
12. Attended a Christmas party and caroled at the door.
13. Located all the Salvation Army bell ringers around our town and gave contributions. We parked, divided the money and went together to deposit it in the red tin.
14. Fun craft: red construction paper and cotton balls, bows and markers; a stocking takes shape. Pasting the kids pictures in the center endears them to the heart. My daughter opted to paste little eye balls over the stocking and though I did not prefer them, it was her work of art. When I was little, my five siblings and I decorated these picture stockings at church. My mom hangs them up every year, though faded, and with shabby cotton balls still clinging to the top.
15. Christmas potluck at church. Kids made lovely paper ornaments at Sunday school. Love those homemade things.
16. Watched White Christmas. Wonderful movie.  Though it is more on the adult side, with the singing and dancing my kids think it’s great. Mason was singing “because we love him, we love him” around the house when it was done. If you have never watched it, do.
17. Took the kids to the Dollar Tree, dollars in hand, with the intention of picking out presents for each other. It was a kick trying to get mason to decide on something for Daphne. First he wanted to look for a doll. Then he found a car and wanted to get that but ended up finding a cheerleader megaphone type yellow plastic toy which he purchased. While we were there we loaded up on a plethora of gross yet colorful candy and went home to make Gingerbread houses. Usually my sister hosts a gingerbread house making party but lately it has become more of an adult affair, (steep competition) so we decided to do our own at home this year. Messy and fun.     

We have another week to go. Try and be a blessing this week to someone else. Remember the reason for the season and for Pete’s sake DO SOMETHING CHRISTMASY

Remember the magic

I know it shouldn’t be this way but the older you get the easier it gets to forget the magic of life. I’m not talking about the hocus pocus Harry Potter magic. I am talking about a childlike sense of wonder. I say it with force: this should not be. As an adult our capacity to intellectualize what exists around us intensifies and the hope that helps us see miracles everywhere diminishes with that so called “life experience”. I think that is one of the reasons I love to visit Disneyland around the Christmas season, to remind myself to remember the magic in life. I witness miracles every day with my kids, yet sometimes I forget to see them. I can't give a definite recipe for cultivating the magic, it might be Disneyland for you or reading or running or coffee. Perhaps watching sunsets or talking with children.

 However,

 I can tell you a couple ways to lose magic: be resentful, bitter, ungracious. Yell on the freeway instead of smile and let it go. Focus on the negative; forget to listen; be impatient with a child...forget to laugh.

 I could go on.  

Just take a moment to remember the magic of life; the simple pleasures; the wonder of breath and love and innocence.

 Just start by remembering.  

Magic

 Beauty

 Security

 Wonder

 Trust

Creativity

Excitement

If a child can do it

Every year on Christmas day before we open our stockings and get started on the presents piled generously under the tree, we read the Christmas story. It is just a little way to focus our remembrance and start off the day with intimacy and gratitude. When my daughter was 3 I started reading her the Christmas story in Luke every day for most of December. Sometimes we would read it several times and I would have her finish all the sentences. By Christmas morning she had it memorized and when we went over to my parents for breakfast and presents, instead of reading the passage out of the scriptures she quoted it. What a fun surprise for everyone. Since then we always brush up on those verses in December by reading them often and quoting them to each other. The last two years she has stood up on stage at Church during Christmas service with a microphone and quoted the passage in her precious child voice. I tell her she is giving a gift to the people at church and to the family when she gets up there brave and steady and tells about Jesus.
This video was when she was four.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BIDUL4D5XJU&feature=youtube_gdata

Life: weddings and ear aches

Yesterday was a cold day. We woke to a snow dusted world with a strong wind whipping the flurries in expressive swirls. A good day not to leave the house. A good day to have hot cocoa and read books by the fire. Not so for us. We had a wedding to attend and the activity required to get five people sharp and in the car for an hour drive all before ten in the morning is significant. It was the first wedding I have attended that requested a color specification for the guests. “Blue of any hue will due” was on the invitation, so we donned our blue attire and sat in a lovely church to hear the vows of two people in love, ready to commit to forever. The guests were, in accordance with the bride and grooms request, attired in blue of all shades and a pleasant sight it was. Though weddings are not relaxing when trying to keep little ones quiet, they are beneficial to attend, for husbands and wives; to remember vows and promises and sacred love shared. The wind blew us there and home again where we got in our cozy’s early and put on “The Muppets Christmas carol” to enjoy a fire and the Christmas spirit while the snow began to fall.

“It’s in the singing of the street corner choir.

It’s going home and getting warm by the fire.

You see wherever you find love, it feels like Christmas”

Life is full of plans and then changing plans. Though my husband and I had the intention of watching a Christmas movie this evening and eating pie, little Mister was feeling badly with an ear ache so our plans changed and we ended up watching Veggie Tales on the couch until he fell asleep. My mom has a home remedy for ear aches that has proved of great value for me in my journey as a mother. All you need is:

warm oil: Castor, olive, or coconut will do

cotton balls

heating pad

plastic bag to protect the heating pad from the oil

Soak the cotton ball in the oil (be sure it isn't too hot) and stick snuggly in the sore ear. Cover with the plastic bag and then the heating pad. Hold on for 20 minutes. I usually do both ears even if the complaint is with one because I have found with ear aches, one ear follows the other.

Being together is wonderful even when the moments are tough.

Day 5 and 6

Day 5

My kids know they get gifts on Christmas and like all self respecting children, they are excited about it. Yesterday, in light of that eventuality, we decided to go into their bedroom and fill up a white trash bag for give away. My daughter is attached to what she has so I am always proud when she chooses on her own what to give away. She came up with a pile, I threw a couple things in on the sly and we put our bag into the car for good will. A very respectable way to prepare for Christmas.

 

Day 6

Nothing like construction paper, scissors and glitter glue to have some fun by. A trip to the Dollar Tree this afternoon for some cheap supplies and we were all set to make snowflakes. (that is, after we stopped by the grocery store for some honey eggnog which is amazing). The goal was to make some fun Christmas decorations to hang around the house. What I didn't realize going in was that there is actually a skill required for making snowflakes out of paper. Who knew. I figured just fold the paper and cut. No, I had to elicit the help of Google on this one. Even then, my snowflakes were sub-par at best but my daughter said "these are beautiful mom". Cousins came over and we had fun.

 

 

 

 

 

What the Heck!

Last night after the kids were tucked snug in their beds and the decibel level had lowered to an even ambient hum, I received my second wind. Yes, I am a night person. I love the night life, always have. When I should be winding down and crawling into bed like a normal tired mom I am doing “just one more thing”, with that free and peaceful feeling that comes with being able to move fast and efficiently without appendages hanging on my legs.

I cleaned and it was glorious. After the tornado passed I sat on the floor in my lovely starched environment and wrapped Christmas presents.

So this evening after once again praying for and tucking, hugging and kissing little angels goodnight I looked around the house.

What the heck!

All the work of the previous night was latent under the chaos and endless activity of the day. I did all those dishes last night. I just washed the floor that now has banana and pear raindrops all over it. I just folded all that laundry now back in the used and dirty pile. I will say it again “What the heck!”

This brings me to a little but important topic called “worth”. Being a full time mom carries with it this mass of conflicting emotion. I still want to do everything and be everything out there in the great wide world. To feel the rush of excitement that accompanies a success or an achievement. To make a mark on the world; a common and identifiable desire. I am not out there much, I am here. I build castles out of blocks, I make pancakes that have Mickey mouse ears. I sing the times tables and the ABC’s when I’m vacuuming and I rarely ever get to use the bathroom without someone needing something.

Then, I look at my three marks and remember to look past the sweet potatoes all over my shoulder or the fact that I never got out of my yoga pants today. Look past the endless laundry and the endless dishes and see my little son learning to walk for the first time, stepping over the blocks generously obscuring the floor. My mark. So I can’t be everything and do everything  right now. But….I can be all I need to be for these little seeds that are growing strong and wonderful right before my eyes.

And it feels pretty good.

 

To give cookies or to eat cookies, that is the question

On Day 3 of our celebration of Christmas, we baked a batch of cookies. No, we didn’t get out the 27 Christmas cookie recipes and make an all day go of it. I mean, times have changed, I have a hard time making a thirty minute meal without interruption let alone devoting a whole day to the festive wonder of Christmas baking. If my brilliance in the kitchen depended on undivided attention….ya, my eggnog would curdle for sure. One recipe, one recipient in mind and we listened to Toby Keiths Christmas album and sifted and stirred.

As the golden brown Thimble cookies came out of the oven my kids were proud. They tasted their handy work but knew that these were made special to be given as a gift. Now today on Day 4 we are putting our creative abilities into home made cards and then off to deliver our little Christmas package to an Aunt and Uncle just moved and probably in need of a little Christmas cheer.

 After we all had our small tastes I must admit the thought of eating a few more and leaving the gift of cookies for another day crossed my mind. Try these, they are delicious.

Grandma Cecile’s Thimble cookies

½ cup butter 

1/4 cup sugar

1 egg separated

1 tsp. Vanilla

1 cup flour

Finely chopped almonds

Seedless raspberry or apricot jam

 

Cream butter and sugar

Add egg yolk, vanilla and flour

Shape into balls

Dip into egg whites then chopped almonds

Dent with thumb and plop some Jam in the middle

Bake at 350 degrees for 17 minutes

Makes 1 to 2 dozen depending on the size

 

 

One ornament a year

25 days of Christmas -Day 2

 

Today was our little family’s tree trimming party. The lovely little seven footer arrived two days ago but there was some manipulating to find a space appropriate. My house is small and has no window or corner that just screams “Christmas tree goes here” but we were going to arrange it somehow, even if the dining room table had to go.

I made a Frittata and hot cocoa and we ate dinner with the box of ornaments in the middle of the table looking them over and talking about their significance and beginnings. My parents started the tradition when I was young of giving an ornament every year to each child (six kids is no small expenditure). When I was married I was given my box of ornaments and the anticipation of continuing a happy tradition with my own kids. Opening the ornament box is like seeing an old friend and talking over old times. The kids loved to see the home made stars and bells and trees made out of dough and decorated with paint and glitter from last year.

 

The lights were strung, the carols playing and we hung those little tokens that represent memories. I am not the mom that will re-do the Christmas tree after the little ones go to bed or put the home made semi ugly ornaments to its back. I like to see the family personality in our handiwork. Sure, I might re-distribute the seventeen ornaments in a 6 inch radius or discreetly remove the one large red bow that my daughter put square in the middle…  then again, I might leave it.  

 

 

 

I started reading Charles Dickens’ Christmas Carol to the kids this morning. Perhaps a five and six year old are full young to be listening to an Author who uses words like execrable, waggish and excrescence but remarkably they can follow the story. And really, the Christmas Carol is around 100 pages long which means you just have to read five pages a day for twenty days and booya! You’ve read a classic.

 

 

 

25 days of Christmas

Hurray for December! We have but 24 days till Christmas and every single one must count. I think that members of society who have an aversion to the busy, gift buying, cookie making, tree trimming season might perhaps focus too much on the bustle without the laughter, or the stress of buying presents without the magic of GIVING gifts. I am determined that my kids will know and feel and love all that exists in the Christmas season, I want them to feel the poignancy of what we are celebrating: the birth of Jesus, and know the pleasure of giving to others.
So...in light of that desire I am going to do something Christmasy with my children every day leading up to Christmas. Whether it be a small activity like singing Christmas songs around the piano all together or larger like throwing a Christmas party, celebrate we will.
Day 1
Tonight my parents hosted a tree trimming party. We decorated the most splendid specimen of an Evergreen I have seen in a while. Food (for being a skinny bunch, the family is serious about food), football (of course), and I'm pretty sure there was butt slapping during the "Giddy-up" song, (at least everyone was slapping their own). Yes, we are an odd bunch but very very merry.
We commemorated the evening by singing Christmas Carols all the way home. The kids were sleepy  and not vocal but they love it when daddy and mommy sing loud and strong from the front seat of the car. And I love it when my husband randomly sings "and Bingo was his name oh B-I-N-G-O...."
Whether young or old, married or not take the time this season to do something every day to "make your spirits bright".

 Moments of Christmas' past

Trying to get family pictures

 2008

2010

Thanksgiving Day is over

As we all know, families grow. Our family used to travel to Santa Maria every Thanksgiving to talk politics with the relatives and catch up with all the cousins over an incredible Thanksgiving feast filled with traditional vitals and first time experimental entrees, ping pong tournaments and shuffle board. Now we are all grown up with spouses and children trying to balance more family and make traditions of our own while still preserving the specialness of the past. Uncle Gary would always make his pumpkin side dish and it is still a prerequisite for Thanksgiving dinner even though it has been years since we have had the pleasure of a Santa Maria Thanksgiving. This year I even whipped up some honey butter in memory of Great Grandma Thompson who despite her years (she lived to be over 100) always made honey butter, making the dinner rolls that much better than normal dinner rolls. From my moms side I make the green jello salad that Grandma Cecile never let us go without when we had our Christmas and Thanksgiving gatherings, though my jello salad is more of a light purple because I use fruit juice instead of the jello packets. We still call it "Grandma Cecile's green jello salad" though.

Thanksgiving Day has come and gone. The feast was everything I could have hoped for, being plentiful and sumptuous. Everyone brought their tasty contributions to the table and we dined with impressive energy.

 Specific moments in life are easy to feel thankful over, the feeling just seems to well up inside and spill over. Thanksgiving dinner was one of those times. I looked down the long lines of family on either side and felt overwhelmed with gratitude:

… for God and the hope that exists in my life because He is ever present.

… For my husband who makes family life so fun.

….For my parents who are the most loyal, unselfish, wonderful people. The city on a hill.

….For my siblings and their spouses who make me laugh at myself and at them; who constantly strive to love more and better and do kind acts without thought to a return.

 ….And my kids, those unique, amazing, aggravating, remarkable, mind-boggling little  miracles, I just want to squeeze their splendid cheeks and cry over them. Thank you God for these babies, they teach me to see the world in richer color.

These moments that make you feel strong emotion aren’t constant, often it takes a great deal of contrivance to feel a tiny surge of gratitude. I often look at my life and see the flaws, the things I am imperfect in, the failings. It is a gift I have, what can I say: a constant awareness of what needs improvement and frankly, a sure way to disseminate unhappiness. I know I harbor this propensity so fight against it I must, to truly live the life I have and help make the happiness of those around me. I know that a grateful heart cultivated on a daily basis and sometimes even a moment to moment basis, is the true recipe for fighting depression and discontent. Thanksgiving of the heart must be a continual commitment not just a once a year awareness.

As I practice thanksgiving everyday I notice a surge and a swelling of gratitude that is as freeing as it is illuminating and am able to feast on the moments, with my children and husband; with my family and the great big world.

“I had the blues

 because I had no shoes,

 till upon the street

I met a man who had no feet.”

 

 

Keeping it moving

 I was able to get out early today for what I hoped would be a nice three mile jog before the rigors of the day began. The morning air was just chill enough to be brisk but the sun was saying a sweater would be an encumbrance. I felt good; motivated to pick up my pace and push myself, with a mixture of some moderately rocking music from my husbands phone in my ear. What a glorious thing exercise is.  I looked at the phone to adjust the song selection (you know how I am with anything techy) and that’s when it happened. I encountered an inconsistency of cement level not uncommon on my chosen path, and began to hurdle forward, upper body moving faster than my poor feet could run. My husbands phone flew from my hand through the air and was only jerked from its flight by the chord still attached to my ears as I hit the ground. I turned and sat, doing as my son does, checking his hands and knees to assess the damage before determining how hard to cry. Alas I did not cry (didn’t want to traumatize my sister) but I was picking gravel out of my hands and lamenting a hole in the left knee of my favorite jogging pants for the remainder of those 3 miles. Now I have a big swollen and bruised knee and a story to tell my kids about how I fell but was brave and tough and didn’t even cry.

 Yet another example of why we should not mess with phones and drive…. or, in my case, jog.

 

Family Vacation Part II - 3 Reasons why a cruise is a good idea

 Reflecting on all the great family getaways we have had I would just like to give a couple reasons why a cruise was a pretty great idea.

 

1. No cell service. For all you who have a hard time separating yourself from the texting and e-mail alerts and other web related distractions, going on a boat where the internet is 75 cents per minute, you realize much can wait for a few days.  The conversation is more fluid and intelligent when the compulsion to check your phone every few minutes has subsided. The eyes clear and began to see, with one less preoccupation, a world of human beings. I know, I know I’m the last person in the world who still has a flip phone so I couldn't possibly understand how wonderful the others are. Humor me, it was nice.
2. No cooking. Hurray! We, as a family rarely eat out and though my meals are often on the fly, it feels, nevertheless, like I am always in the kitchen. This was a nice treat for me. Every time my boy said “I so hungry mom” I would run up six flights of stairs to the dinning room and bring a bowl of fruit and a buffet down to our room to satiate the pangs. (Also a good way not to come home twice your original size)
3. Going and doing and being together while we were going and doing (says husband). If you are going with extended fam and might not want to see them twenty-four/seven it’s perfect. Plenty of places to hide out. Or, if you are like my sister and her boy friend, just bring wigs, glasses and mustaches and go wherever you wish with total anonymity.

 

 As I was preparing to post this excerpt on the 3 reasons a cruise is a good idea I happened to read another great blog from a person of near acquaintance who writes about the 21 reasons why. So read jollylittlelife.blogspot.com for the real scoop. Gotta love that jolly girl.